Greetings in Turkey are warmer and more elaborate than the quick hellos you may be used to, and getting them right opens doors wherever you go. The rules depend on who you are meeting: a friend, an elder, a shopkeeper, or a business contact. The good news is that Turks are wonderfully tolerant of visitors who make the effort, and a genuine smile covers most mistakes. This guide walks you through the words to use and the body language that goes with them, so you can start every encounter on the right foot.
The Basics: Selam and Merhaba
The first words you need are simple. “Merhaba” is the standard hello, used in nearly every situation, and it is the safest choice for visitors in shops, restaurants, and on the street. “Selam” is a shorter, more casual version, closer to “hi,” and it works well among people of similar age or status.
When someone greets you, you reply with the same word, often followed by a polite question. “Nasilsiniz?” means “How are you?” and the expected answer is “Iyiyim, tesekkurler,” which means “I am well, thank you.” You can then ask the same question back, which is friendly rather than formal.
The afternoon greeting “Iyi gunler” means “Good day” and is used when arriving and leaving. In the evening you can say “Iyi aksamlar,” and before bed “Iyi geceler.” These phrases work everywhere, and using them marks you as someone who made the effort.
The Handshake
The handshake is the standard greeting between adults in Turkey, and it carries a few subtle rules. It should be firm, with direct eye contact and a smile, and it lasts a moment longer than a quick Western handshake. A weak, reluctant grip is read as a lack of interest.
Between men, the handshake is straightforward, and after shaking, close acquaintances may touch cheeks, shoulders, or use a light hand on the upper arm. Between women, the same rules apply. In mixed company, the woman usually initiates the handshake; a man should not push his hand forward first.
For visitors, the practical rule is simple: follow the other person’s lead. If they extend a hand, shake it. If they offer a kiss on the cheek instead, accept it gracefully. Do not be offended by the absence of a handshake, because in some traditional settings, religious men and women may simply nod and place a hand over the heart instead.
The Cheek Kiss: When and How
The cheek kiss, known as “opucuk,” is the greeting of close friends and family, and it often surprises visitors. Between women, and between a man and a woman, it usually means one or two light kisses on the cheeks, often with the heads tilted to alternate sides. Between men, close friends sometimes exchange cheek kisses too, though a handshake is more common.
The key is that the kiss is social, not romantic, and it says nothing beyond warmth and closeness. It is reserved for people you know, so do not kiss a shopkeeper or a stranger you have just met. As a visitor, you will rarely need to initiate it; just accept it warmly when it is offered.
If you are unsure, watch and mirror. A smile, a nod, and a polite handshake are always safe, and erring on the side of formality is the common-sense choice.
Respecting Elders
Elders occupy a special place in Turkish greetings, and the rules for meeting them matter. When you enter a room where an older person is present, greet them first, before younger people, and stand up if you were seated. The elder usually receives the first handshake and the most formal greeting.
When greeting an elder, use the formal register and their title. Kissing the hand of an elderly relative and touching it to the forehead is a traditional gesture of respect, though visitors are never expected to perform it.
In practice, you can show respect by rising when an elder enters, greeting them warmly, offering your seat, and listening attentively. Elders are greeted with the phrase “Efendim” or simply by their title, and they may address you with affection. The warmth you show elders is noticed by everyone in the room.
Names and Titles
Turkish names follow the Western order: given name first, then surname. You can use first names with people your own age or younger; with older people, colleagues, and officials, add a title until invited to be less formal.
The titles “bey” and “hanim” are essential. “Ahmet Bey” is the respectful way to address a man, and “Ayse Hanim” the respectful way to address a woman, roughly equivalent to “Mr.” and “Ms.” used after the name. Professional titles like “doktor” for doctor and “profesor” for professor are used the same way.
Do not be shy about asking someone’s name if you missed it. Address people by name when you can, because using a name shows attention and respect. And when someone gives you their card, take it with both hands or your right hand, and look at it before putting it away.
Formal and Informal Registers
Turkish has two registers, and choosing the right one is part of greeting well. The formal “siz” is used with strangers, elders, superiors, and in most first meetings; the informal “sen” is used with friends, family, children, and people you know well. Using “sen” too early can feel presumptuous.
In greetings, the register shows in the verbs and in phrases like “Nasilsiniz?” for formal and “Nasilsin?” for informal. When in doubt, use the formal form; Turks will invite you to switch to “sen” when they feel close enough, usually with a phrase like “Sen diyebilirsin,” meaning “You can say sen.”
As a visitor, you will rarely be corrected for using the formal register, but you might offend with premature informality. If a Turkish friend suggests you use “sen,” accept the invitation gladly, because it is a genuine sign of closeness. Matching the other person’s register is the safest approach in every situation.
Greetings in Different Regions
Turkey is a large country, and greetings vary from region to region. In Istanbul and the big cities, greetings are modern and quick: a handshake, a smile, a polite “merhaba.” In the east and southeast, greetings are more elaborate and traditional, with more pleasantries and often a hand over the heart.
In the Black Sea region you may hear “Kolay gelsin,” meaning “May it come easily,” a phrase of encouragement for anyone busy. In the Aegean and Mediterranean towns, greetings are relaxed and cheerful, and shopkeepers and cafe staff often welcome you as if you were a neighbor.
In villages and small towns, strangers greet each other, so do not be surprised when people nod and say “Merhaba” or “Iyi gunler” as you pass. Greeting back is the polite response and one of the charms of rural travel; a returning smile turns a passerby into a momentary friend.
Body Language and Eye Contact
The words matter, but the body does the real talking. Eye contact is essential in Turkish greetings: looking away during a handshake can seem evasive or uninterested. Hold the gaze warmly, with a genuine smile, and the greeting will feel sincere even with limited language.
Posture counts too. Stand when you greet someone who arrives, lean in slightly, and offer your right hand. Nodding is part of the greeting, and the head is sometimes tilted to one side as a sign of warmth. Avoid the American-style wave in formal settings, and never greet someone with your left hand extended.
When someone greets you, mirror their warmth. If they ask how you are, answer and return the question. In Turkey, a greeting is a small conversation, not a transaction, and the extra thirty seconds you spend on it will be remembered. People judge visitors by warmth more than by perfect language.
Greetings in Business
Business greetings in Turkey follow the same warm principles with a formal polish. Arrive on time, stand to greet, and use the formal register with titles and surnames until invited to do otherwise. The handshake is firm, eye contact is steady, and the greeting is followed by genuine pleasantries before any business talk begins.
Business cards are exchanged with both hands or the right hand, and you should take a moment to read the card you receive before placing it away. Do not write on someone’s card, and do not put it in your back pocket. Small talk about your journey, the weather, or your impressions of the city is expected before any discussion of work.
The most important rule is patience: Turkish business culture builds relationships before transactions. Greetings are longer, tea and coffee appear quickly, and rushing to business is seen as impolite. Treat the greeting as the foundation of the meeting, and the meeting itself will go more smoothly.
Common Mistakes to Avoid
A few greeting mistakes are common among visitors, and all are easily fixed. Using the informal “sen” too early is the most frequent error, so stick with the formal “siz” until invited. Forgetting to greet elders first, or failing to stand when someone arrives, also reads as disrespect in traditional settings.
Pumping the hand vigorously or holding a handshake too long can feel aggressive, and a limp handshake can feel cold. Avoiding eye contact, or brushing off the polite “How are you?” question with a one-word answer, misses the social point of the greeting. Do not be surprised by the cheek kiss, and do not force one either.
The best approach is to treat every greeting as a small moment of connection. Smile, make eye contact, use the formal register, and answer the pleasantries fully. Turks do not expect perfection from visitors; they expect warmth. Greet people the way you would like to be greeted, and you will rarely go wrong.
Frequently asked questions
What is the most common way to say hello in Turkey?
“Merhaba” is the standard greeting, suitable in almost every situation, from shops to hotels to the street. “Selam” is a more casual version used among friends. After greeting, it is polite to ask “Nasilsiniz?” meaning “How are you?” and to answer the same question when it is asked back.
When should I use “sen” instead of “siz”?
“Sen” is the informal form, used with friends, family, children, and close acquaintances, while “siz” is formal, used with strangers, elders, and superiors. When in doubt, use “siz,” and wait for the other person to invite you to switch to “sen,” which is a genuine sign of closeness.
Is the cheek kiss expected from foreigners?
No. The cheek kiss is reserved for close friends and family, and visitors are never expected to initiate it. A warm handshake with eye contact and a smile is always appropriate. If a Turkish friend offers a cheek kiss, accept it naturally, but for everyone else, the handshake is the safe and polite choice.
All Over Information
The All Over Information editorial team researches and writes practical English-language guides to Turkey. Facts are checked against official and local sources before publication, prices are published as dated ranges rather than quotes, and guides are revised when things change. We accept no sponsored posts, paid placements or paid links.
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